Archive for the ‘Authors’ Category
The Strange Story of Hugh Djass
Wednesday, April 7th, 2010
Hugh Djass got picked on a lot as a kid, but whenever he complained to his father, Del Djass, Del said the same thing:
“Son, you have the name you do because I love you. Your mom didn’t want it, and I know you don’t want it right now, but I think someday you’ll thank me. If you can make it through childhood, head held high, with a name like ‘Hugh Djass,’ you can make it through anything.”
“Dad, I really don’t like it! We have to change it!”
“Not until you’re 16. Then I’ll gladly sign the papers if that’s what you want, because you’ll have made it through childhood. Until then, you’ll just have to man up.”
So Hugh manned up. He ignored the taunts and waited for everyone to get tired of them. Unfortunately, they didn’t–but on the bright side, the friends Hugh eventually made were all people with a sense of humor.
On Hugh’s 16th birthday he received a stamp collecting set from his father. Hugh wasn’t remotely interested in stamp collecting.
“The thing is, Hugh, stamp collecting teaches you discipline and attention to detail. Don’t knock it before you try it!”
“OK,” Hugh said. “Thanks, dad. But now I need something else from you.” And Hugh slowly took a folded form from his jacket pocket. It was a name change form.
Del frowned. Hugh burst into tears. “I just can’t stand it any more, Dad! Just sign it, OK? Please?”
Del obviously wasn’t crazy about the idea, but Hugh knew he was a man of his word, and he flipped to the end and signed.
The next afternoon when Del returned from work, Hugh was sitting at the table, working on his homework, whistling.
“So,” Del said, “did you change your name?”
“Well, it’s a funny thing,” said Hugh. “I filed the form, but I decided not to change my name, at least not directly.”
“I don’t understand,” Del said.
“It’s changed, all right, but I don’t think there’s much difference in practical terms between being named ‘Hugh Djass’ or ‘Hugh Djass, Jr.'” He handed a court-validated copy of the form to Del. “Should’ve read it first, Dad. Attention to detail, right?”
Then Hugh gathered up his homework and left Hugh Djass, Senior alone with his thoughts.
Positive
Tuesday, April 6th, 2010
Tom Burns sank into the examination room’s chair next to the table on which his wife lay. They exchanged wary glances. She turned to Doctor Paull.
“You double-checked?”
“Triple.” The doctor looked at her belly, then away. Even when she stood the baby barely showed. Hard to believe they could run a whole battery of genetic tests on something so small. Hard to believe they could find something so life-changing. so awful.
Tom’s fingers entwined with Beth’s. He squeezed, a we’ll-get-through-this-together gesture. Clearing his throat, he said, “We knew it was possible when you said we both had the, uh, recessive genes. The next step is treatment?”
“Yes, though that’s post-natal. Education for both of you is vital between now and the birth.” The doctor motioned for Beth to sit up. “The good news is that your daughter is fine physically. Her development is–”
“Daughter?”
“Oh, yes. Sorry. When I get a positive it tends to– Well, anyway, she’s fine. We’ve seen enough of these cases at Providence that I doubt we’ll run into any unexpected complications.”
Beth stood and stepped into her shoes. “In the mean time, besides the classes, I just need to avoid pregnant animals and recently-plowed fields, right?”
“That’s it.” The doctor opened the door for them. “And warn anybody you visit to check their milk for curdling.” He put a gentle hand on Beth’s elbow as she passed, then on Tom’s.
“Don’t worry,” he said, following them down the hall toward his waiting room. “With our modern techniques, most children with this affliction grow up to be model citizens. Why, it’s been years since there’s been a witch-burning.”