Plugs

Angela Slatter’s story ‘Frozen’ will appear in the December 09 issue of Doorways Magazine, and ‘The Girl with No Hands’ will appear in the next issue of Lady Churchill’s Rosebud Wristlet.

Edd Vick’s latest story, “The Corsair and the Lady” may be found in Talebones #37.

Kat Beyer’s Cabal story “A Change In Government” has been nominated for a BSFA award for best short fiction.

Alex Dally MacFarlane’s story “The Devonshire Arms” is available online at Clarkesworld.

10 Answers to the Question “Where’d You Get Your Black Eye?”

by Luc Reid

1. “Yeah, I didn’t think you could get hurt head-butting a shark. Cartilaginous fish, my ass!”

2. “It’s a tattoo. Like it?”

3. “From your mom. Man, she is one wild chick!”

4. “Extreme chess.”

5. “Well, I was asking this guy how he got his black eye, and apparently he’d had it with answering that over and over …”

6. “I was sitting next to this pregnant lady on the bus and I said, ‘So, when are you due?’ Long story short, he wasn’t actually pregnant.”

7. “Oh, this isn’t mine.”

8. “I heard these weird noises late at night from my neighbor’s house, terrible, inhuman ululations. I crept into my back yard and climbed the fence to land on their weedy, overgrown lawn. A pale green light pulsed in the neighbors’ attic window, silhouetting a dark figure that it seemed to be clawing to get out. I moved closer, slipping silently through the grass, my eyes riveted to the window–and that’s when I stepped on the rake.”

9. “The black eye is nothing! It’s the microchip they implanted in my brain that worries me.”

10. “Well, it’s actually kind of a funny story involving you, me, this conversation, and a time machine stuck in a loop, but I’m so sick of telling it, you might as well just go ahead and punch me now.”

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One Response to “10 Answers to the Question “Where’d You Get Your Black Eye?””

  1. Eric Says:

    March 21st, 2011 at 3:39 am

    Damn. That was funny. Damn. Number 3 was so f*ing funny I said it to this dude and now I got two black eyes. Shit. That hurt. Damn.